By Jill Palmquist
It’s all too human to have high expectations for Thanksgiving. Long hours in the kitchen, the undercurrent of dysfunctional family dynamics, and (worst-case scenario) the political squabble that erupts out of nowhere. There goes our idyllic vision of a day of joyful togetherness—and with it, our gratitude. Norman Rockwell was a figment of an archaic imagination.
I have a remedy: pause and really notice those exquisite little details of life that we take for granted.
Real gratitude comes from realizing that just being here, alive in this moment, is a miracle. Our bodies, our minds, and our hearts can do extraordinary things. And this is a season where we can witness it closely: sinking our teeth into a turkey drumstick. Sitting together, at a table, with people we love, talking and laughing.
I’m no Eckhart Tolle, but it all comes down to living in the now. Being in the moment. Paying attention. On an abstract level, we know this, but it’s just so darn easy to forget it. By pausing for a minute, we can feel not merely thankful but ecstatically grateful for our life—imperfections and all—which is so full of wonder and awe.
Shifting our mindset to awaken to and be grateful for everyday awe is the drumbeat of my stunning new coffee table book. In This Lifetime is filled with breathtaking photographs, thought-provoking essays, proverbs, parables, conversation starters, and distilled snippets of life wisdom. The words alone are mesmerizing. But the combination of inspired language and photographs brings the joy and wonder of the human experience into focus.
Becoming a world-class noticer this Thanksgiving can refill our gratitude cup. Here’s a couple ways to start.
Use your nose. It remembers more than your eyes. That schnoz of yours is ready to evoke emotion. Coffee brewing. Pumpkin pie baking. The perfume your Aunt Betsy has worn for the past 40 years. (Okay. They’re not all that good.) Close your eyes and breathe it all in. Transport yourself back to childhood or other significant life moments.
Tap your tastebuds. Those little guys work overtime on these holidays. From the comforting flavors of turkey and dressing to the tantalizing tastes of homemade desserts (and maybe a sip of something bubbly!), savor the tastes and textures of your holiday feast…and the memories they awaken.
Feel the beat (of your own heart)… Take the family on a brisk after-dinner walk. Look at your legs! Your strong and powerful legs. Whisper a little thank-you for letting them move you. Blood pumping in your veins is tangible vitality!
…And don’t stop there with your heart. It’s not just physically keeping you alive; it represents our infinite capacity to experience vivid emotions and feelings. Not just positive ones like elation and love but also the more bittersweet sensations that show up during the holidays: nostalgia, grief, and awareness of the passage of time and life’s brevity.
Readjust your perspective on family time. Take, for example, your little nephew’s temper tantrum. Even the meltdown of an overtired toddler can remind us how quickly it all goes, how fragile we all are, how profound love can be, and how normal it is to fully embrace our feelings (even the difficult ones) and let them be here.
It may help you to remember that moms have tantrums, too. They usually just go into the pantry to have them, then come back cool, calm, and collected.
Listen to that story Grandpa is telling (for the hundredth time). Spending time with older generations and finding the truth and wisdom in their words is a gift. This isn’t about morbidity, but nobody knows how much time any of us have. So engage. Memorize your elders’ mannerisms, the sound of their voices, and the twinkle in their eyes. They know things. Listen. Learn.
And finally—when it’s over and exhaustion sets in—sit down and let the stillness take you. It was a glorious, shimmering day of living in the present. Whether or not everything went as planned (spoiler alert: it didn’t!), you now get to collapse on the couch, wrapped in a cozy blanket. There, you can feel thankful for the many moments—the mundane and the extraordinary—you were lucky enough to experience.
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About the Author:
Jill Palmquist is Life Time vice president and chief storyteller and the author of In This Lifetime, a coffee table book that celebrates the beauty and reminds us of the brevity of the human experience. A graduate of the University of Minnesota School of Journalism, she worked as an agency copywriter. With the birth of her daughter, she took a leap to go freelance, working on a variety of fun brands for a variety of fun companies, including luxury leisure and lifestyle company Life Time. While never pretending to understand the founder’s brilliant brain, she did understand his heart and realized her desire to help people see the magnificence of their lives was completely aligned with his. Both her love of the company and responsibilities grew, proving what they say is true: time flies when you’re having fun. (That baby girl is now 23 years old.) While happy with all the work she’s done for the company, it’s true fulfillment she feels in contributing to the brand’s recent transformation.
About the Book:
In This Lifetime (Wise Ink, September 2024, ISBN: 978-1-63489-689-4, $105.00) is available from Life Time, Inc.
About Life Time:
Life Time (NYSE: LTH) empowers people to live healthy, happy lives through its portfolio of more than 170 athletic country clubs across the United States and Canada. The health and wellness pioneer also delivers a range of healthy-way-of-life programs and information via its complimentary Life Time Digital app. The company’s healthy living, healthy aging, healthy entertainment communities and ecosystem serve people 90 days to 90+ years old and is supported by a team of more than 45,000 dedicated professionals. In addition to delivering the best programs and experiences through its clubs, Life Time owns and produces nearly 30 of the most iconic athletic events in the country.